life: when something has to give

Not only have I not posted here for over a month, I haven’t even clicked on my backend interface.

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So it feels remarkably odd that I today, for no apparent reason, I decided to get back in the saddle. Over the last six years (can you believe I’ve been blogging for six years), I’ve written a number of apologetic posts, explaining my brief one/two/three week break. It’s usually something to do with a holiday, or lack of inspiration. But this last month, it was neither. I had ideas, I wasn’t away. Life just got too much. And I didn’t recognise it until a week or two ago. Let’s rewind to January. Hitting the ground running after two weeks in California over Christmas (more on that here, here and here if you’re one for a self-promotional plug), I was back at work with a thump. Within nine days of being back, I took on a new role. I suppose it was a promotion of some sort, but it effectively meant a shed load more work. My contract changed, and without going into details, I lost a lot of holiday I came to rely on – not only for my blog, but for my mental wellbeing. This coupled with a hugely increased workload, was the start of it. I also took on an enormous side project, still at work, but something that wasn’t part of my actual role. It was fun, but draining, and to top it all off, I decided January was also the month I was going to join the gym. I committed to at least four days a week, straight after work. And it wasn’t until the side project recently finished, that I recognised that perhaps life had got a little much over the past few months!

Something had to give and blogging was that. I think we’re all guilty of biting off more than we can chew, and not recognising our efforts or the strain we’re putting ourselves under. And if we eventually do, it’s usually too late. It wasn’t until one of my other time demands eased up, that my brain was able to give way to something else. I’ve had exciting conversations with people over the last month or two, that could result in great things, that I’ve just had to cut short – my brain just felt full up. I couldn’t focus, or compute the information. And although I have felt fine in myself, physically, my brain was at capacity. I’m a good sleeper generally, I wake up early, I feel awake during the day. My body is reacting positively to my gym efforts and as I say, I feel good in myself. But there was this niggling feeling in my mind – why wasn’t I blogging? I couldn’t even bring myself to switch on my laptop, or take more than one photo for Instagram. I had no drive to create any sort of content – I just felt like I couldn’t add anymore to my overflowing brain. I needed my downtime more than ever, I needed to sit on the sofa, watch the television and escape, during the brief periods I had to do nothing. Blogging didn’t figure in my brain-sphere!

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I’ve talked before about what goes into creating a blog post (it’s one of my favourite posts, you can find it here). And it’s a lot. And for some, it really is their relaxation. But I find the process something I need to be ready for. I need to be motivated, physically and mentally. I need to be positive and feeling confident in my abilities. When your day job is taking over, it’s hard to feel any of those things outside of your working hours. But today’s post hasn’t come about for no apparent reason, as I first thought. For the first time in a long time, I felt like there was a slot of time on my hands. A brief area of my brain that was up to the job of writing and blogging, and I grabbed it before it slipped away again! So, hopefully I’m back properly now – with a few bits and bobs coming up soon. I’m actually working on a new beauty post about some recent buys, so I hope that will be live soon.

Thank you for sticking around during my hiatus – here’s to Spring and new beginnings!

PS – These photos were taken a few weeks ago when we spent the weekend in Devon. We visited a village called Beer, not far from Lyme Regis and it was DREAMY. A must if you are looking for a weekend of R&R!

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  • Hey, I totally GET this. When you’re busy at work, running a home and trying to have a life, it’s only to be expected that something’s gotta give…if the blog is just a hobby and you’ve not ‘blogger jobs’ on, it’s so easy to just leave it. I struggle with all the time. I want to keep going with it but actually having the ‘be arsed’ attitude to do it after work on a weekend when thousands of other things are more appealing it often the way. That said, I love your blog and these pictures are dreamy! Look forward to seeing what you’ve got planned. And remember, the perk of a blog is it’s an archive so readers will always catch up….not like me reading as soon as you hit publish on my lunch at work!

    Ruth – http://www.ruth-writes.co.uk x

    • Thanks so much Ruth, really means alot that you enjoy my blog after all this time! It definitely is a push to get stuff done outside of work! x

  • Julia Day

    I really relate to this. Sometimes I’m literally scared to open up Blogger! Blogging, working and maintaining a social life can be overwhelming.

    Sometimes it just takes one post to get out of a slump!

    Julia x
    http://www.juliarachelday.co.uk

    • It’s true! Just that one and the hurdle is done. Glad you can relate, Julia!

  • I definitely agree, it’s tough as there are only so many hours in the day. For me also blogging is not something I do to relax. I enjoy it but I started my blog to challenge myself which means it does take effort. This weekend I’ve gone away with my mum and I’ve just accepted I won’t get time to write this weekend. Glad to know I’m not the o my one. Xxx
    Ps. I was reading this post thinking huh this looks a lot like Beer, it really is lovely isn’t it?

    • That’s it isn’t it! Sometimes you just have to accept life gets in the way. Beer is SO beautiful! x